10 Things they don’t tell you about motherhood

As most women do, the moment I knew I was pregnant, I started my research about everything I can know about this new phase of life. Starting from books, websites, videos, articles,,,, etc everything. Yet despite all of this, I was still surprised with some stuff that no one warned me about. And I assure you that even after reading this, you will face something different that you didn’t hear about from the doctor or your research.

1- The Standard Inconveniences 

Anything you feel out of the ordinary, it’s because of preganancy. Pain in weird places, nasal congestion, sleeplessness, tiredeness, hemorrhoid, ear humming, breathlessness, weird dreams, you name it. After knowing the symptoms and checking out what it is, you will find pregnancy as one of the symptoms. It messes the balance of your whole body. So don’t worry, and look for how to deal with these inconveniences.

2- Saving up some zzz,,, HA!

People told me to sleep as much as I can in the last phase of pregnancy to “save up hours of sleep for later on”. It’s true that you won’t have a deep enjoyable 8 hours of sleep as you used to (for me I can count the number of 8-hours of sleep nights on one hand and I gave birth in January!). BUT no matter how much rest you had in the last phase of pregnancy, these hours of extra dozing won’t do a thing and you will be dead tired in the first few months. Motherhood tax.

3- Paiiiiiiiiiiin ? or pain pain pain?

Choosing whether you want a natural birth or C-section  ultimately ends with just one question. Are you capable of withholding one extremely intense pain for one day, or would you prefer milder pain for several days. Your pain, your choice.

4- Goodbye old me

The moment you know you are pregnant, your whole life has changed. Your relationship with your parents, in-laws, family friends will be different. You will appreciate more the challenges your mum endured to raise you and you will feel sorry for every time you had a fight, cause at the end of the day you won’t be able to imagine that your baby, for whom you have suffered so much, will get angry on you for an extra hour to sit with friends. You will feel the importance of family ties and extended family meanings. Your discussions will ultimately resolve around child care, which is not very interesting to your single friends.

5- Can I offer you some Tea?

The second & third months of pregnancy, and the first two months after giving birth are the hardest. God be with you. And be a sweetheart and don’t impose your visits on new mothers during this critical period, unless you are close friends and you’ll be able to offer help, cause new mums won’t have the mind or the energy to play host.

6- Humm Num

This is a repeated advice, but here it goes. During pregnancy, if you can make food & preserve it in the freezer, do so. Or else collect all home delivery menus you can, make a mental list on where you can get fast, yummy lunch. You won’t be able to step in the kitchen for a long time, and thinking where to eat will be an added nuisance. Plus, eating the same take out food over and over again will be boooring. So prepare ahead.

7- Doc Talks

Your doctors will be provide you with all the details you need to know to go through pregnancy. Talking with family & friends might give you further information, but your research is indispensable. On my first doctor visits (& I have tried more than one), I expected him/ her to go through pregnancy step by step, with all what I needed to know on what to eat, what to expect, what to fear, what not to fear, but even the most experienced doctor can’t possibly give you all that you need to know. There are lots of resources on this subject, and elhamdlelah God provided with the tools to understand more and face less surprises, so why not use it.

8- S, for Surgery

During the C section, my body was shivering, I felt extremely annoyed, I wanted to throw up, and ill at ease in general. And for a few days afterwards, my neck and back were killing me. NORMAL.

9- Scale issues

I was very concerned about pregnancy as I am already overweight. But I discovered that it is not necessarily that pregnancy will make you fatter. I kept track of my weight, and surprisingly I didn’t gain that much after I gave birth. But the doctor mentioned it with a certain tone a couple of time, namely while looking on the sonar screen, after the surgery, looking after the stitches. So fat is not really helpful during pregnancy, but it is not to be feared.

10- It’s all worth it

Finally, and this is something all books, and advice columns mention, despite all the hardships, pain, nuisance, sleepless nights (and days), frustration, headache and general exhaustion , you will feel the true sense of happiness and peace.

Welcome to motherhood. Enjoy the ride!

One response to “10 Things they don’t tell you about motherhood

  1. Pingback: 10 Things they don't tell you about motherhood | Kaleidoscope « celldorman

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